thgit / os em dloh ot desu / em dloh ot dseu / dloh ot dseu
- The opening sequence for You Used To Hold Me (So Tight), Thelma Houston, 'Qualifying Heat'

Help me. I've fallen and I can't get up.

Work started just last week and I should be studying and planning for assignments soon to fall upon me in the springtime. I planned on reading a book by the end of the week but went to buy a MP3 CD player instead. I planned on studying but reading a Vibe doesn't really constitute expanding horizons in the software environment. I meant to listen to these study recordings but I can't really hear something when I'm in the bed for an extended nap on such a perfect day.

Let's not even talk about exercising, walking Ms. Anna, and fullfilment of personal plans of destiny in 2003.

In the midst of hanging out with Ewedontno this weekend, who came down to make sure I wasn't terribly damaged in the Bone Rip Appointment (see above), my mother came to the house, crying. She doesn't know what's wrong with her. Her eyes full of tears when her stomach should be full of rotisserie chicken, we went shopping and talked about her problems. Her depression keeps coming to haunt her, and she doesn't know what the problem is. She seems to feel much better when I talk to her. It's these things that make me realize that I feel much better being a healer, and not a worrier.

Alright, I'm back out of the bed again...I'm sure I'll be back soon, but for now, it's back on the road.

On the week of J's birthday, and my release from medical sabbatical, I've been thinking. About some of everything.

I'm wondering what happened to my brain. If I can sit down and enjoy Kevin Smith but fall asleep to an instructor course in Universal Application Networking, then maybe I need to hangout and work at a television station instead of being a computer consultant.

I need to travel. I'm getting out of the house, my passport is on it's way, I'm switching specialties at work that are best observed in Geneva and Sydney than Atlanta and New York, so I'll be all over the place.

I'm also trying to type and not think about how much my hip feels like someone stabbed me in it and how Prime has kept me away from getting a prescription for some painkiller. Why, do you ask? Well, it started just the day before yesterday...

I get up Thursday morning and prepare for this bone marrow test that I have to take again because the first one got screwed up. " I'm so sorry, I know we were supposed to get bone marrow, but instead all we got was fat!" I started to scream and yell, but I figure that the first one didn't really hurt me so another one wouldn't be so bad. Then, as an added bonus, the doctor told me she would do it herself instead of her nurse. I think that this is going to be okay, so I look forward to this reenactment of bone marrow retraction.

So I'm sitting in my car ready for the 9am appointment and I get this phone call on my cell phone from the doctor's office. "ej, I'm so sorry but the nurse is sick, so instead of doing you coming in at 9, can you come in tomorrow at 9 instead? Mind you, it's 8:36am. Again, I start to scream, because 1) it's 8:36am and 2) the doctor is supposed to be doing this, not the nurse, so what difference does it make that she's sick? After this, I get out of my car, go back upstairs, take my clothes off and I'm so pissed, I can't do anything but go back to sleep.

So today is Friday, and I'm ready again for the 9am appointment, except at 8:57am, I'm stuck in a traffic jam just 5 minutes shy of the doctors office. I get there at 9:15am, only to wait until 9:45am for them to prepare everything and get me ready. Again, shy of screaming, I get to lay down on a table, being prepared by "the strange man" who looks at me in such a way that I think he's going to try to fondle me.

The nurse starts her anasthetic, and then she goes a-diggin' for more bone. After 30 minutes of local anesthesia and digging for good marrow, she, in an exasperated voice, says "We have to call the doctor in, I can't get anything". She calls the doctor in, who decides that she can find the bone quickly - and that I don't need any painkiller. So for 60 seconds I deal with the onset of pain. Using her ways of digging, chopping, slicing, and dicing, she finds what she needs, takes off her gloves, and runs back out the door. I get dressed and I go back to work again.

In the middle of the presentation today at work I can only think that I'm very exhausted, but as soon as I get ready to fall asleep, the pain comes back and reminds me of the fun time I've had earlier. We have a great presentation without me screaming in the client's direction demanding Darvacet, and I sit in the traffic for an hour and a half trying to get home.

Thus my long day. I'm given some Tylenol, and I drift away....

After my long sleep, Prime, Boom and I take J. to Mi Spia, and are met there by Wood. What do we talk about in the midst of amaretto and creme? The blog and all the blog-people. I remember how I miss everyone, and how I don't read enough blogs. Therefore, my springtime indulgence is to read everyone more, because as long as I'm in pain, drinking amaretto and creme, watching Kevin Smith, and travelling the world, I might as well keep up with the gods and the goddesses of the blog, right?

Right!

It's the beginning of March. This is the month that I'm legally able to drive in the State of Georgia (mental note: if you have a brain seizure, move to another state for 12 months if you still want to be able to drive). On yesterday, Monday, March 3, I went to work for the very first time in a year. I had an interview, updated my skillset and resume, took pictures for a passport, finished taking all of my courses, and now I get to take a certification test again on Friday.

So why am I freaked out?

Because I'm used to working more than 40 hours a week. But now a signed statement says that I shouldn't work more than 40. Period. Let's see how long that lasts (at 2am: "oh, I'm just talking to Antonio on IM" translates to "I said hello to Antonio and then I worked on data warehousing while watching reruns of Kingpin"). I'm obviously going to need some help here.

And then to come back to work and having to refresh my memory is going to kill me too. I'm used to knowing things and finding the answers if I don't. Now it's like I had amnesia or something. I could tell you all about 24, but forget about little things like how to log into my computer.

I want to go and hang out at a bar. However, instead of going out to a club in Atlanta, I instead go to New York or Chicago. What's with that?

And on top of that...it's HIS birthday today.

Guess there is a bright side to every day, huh?